RH Advocates: The "Mythbusting"

Just today, my mother showed me a couple of packs of pleasure lubes, which, I think she got from one of my bags when I sent them to be washed (note to self, re-check bags, just in case I leave something important in it before it gets tossed in the washing machine). With a controlled voice that I didn't know was possible, especially coming from a conservative mom asking her youngest daughter about any paraphernalia related to sex,, she asked me, "What is this?", to which I unflinchingly answered, "They were give-aways in RH events that I go to. They would always give stuff like those." After a moment's silence she asked again, "Who gave them to you?" I told her they were from sponsors. 

Kudos to my mom for not going crazy over it. I know other parents would have. 

I have two things to say to the people reading this blog before I go on: first, I was telling the truth; second, bitch please, I don't need lubes.

Being an RH advocate and an RH educator has exposed me to a lot of negative feed backs. Just the label itself (something I'm very proud of), the tendency to have the word "vagina" spilling from my mouth, and my personal campaign against victim-blaming in rape (a head-on challenge to the People of the Idiot Society) have gotten me to a lot of negative situations. I haven't had it bad, like some of my more popular colleagues (hurrah for being a social outcast!), but I have been accused of some pretty nasty stuff, some by people who I'm very close to. 

That's okay, I understand the stigma glued to the label "RH advocates". But these labels-to-labels are mostly myths blown up to epic proportions. Most myths have been answered by my fellow advocates (like we're ALL pro-abortion or we're all spawns of Satan), so it would be pointless to blog about it. In the spirit of one of my favorite Discovery Channel show, I'd like to go mythbusters on some of these misconceptions.

There are a lot of misconceptions about the RH Bill, but there
are also misconceptions about the people who rally beneath
the banner of the Purple Ribbon. 

For example:

Myth#1: To be an advocate means that you must have experienced in what you are advocating. Crux: RH advocates are all non-virgins and are knowledgeable in the use of contraceptives because they use it all the time.

Some advocate rape prevention and survival are rape victims, yes. On the other hand, I'm also an advocate against nurse "volunteerism", wherein nurses are asked to pay a certain hospital so that the said hospital can give them slots as volunteers, but I have never been a nurse volunteer myself (nor will I ever be). How do those of us with no experience in sex and contraception educate people, you ask? Well, for one thing, a significant number of us come from medical or paramedical backgrounds.

Reality check: RH and sexuality is a significant part of our curriculum. We have been trained to look at sex and sexuality in logical, non-giggling-like-idiots manner. One reason why people welcomed to come to us about safely doing the deed. 

As a nurse, I've studied, looked at, and handled my fair share of penises and vagina during my days learning about Maternal and Child Nursing and Psychiatric Nursing. I've also touched my fair share of organs during my clinical days - with gloves, of course. Heck, we even talk about sexual deviations like fetishes, voyeurism, and bestiality during my college days. Malice has been practically trained out of us. Those who don't believe me, kindly comment so I can scan and present our book on MCN and Psych Nursing. 

So if someone would want to blame my outlook as an advocate about sex, please feel free to blame my nursing education, as well as my liberated personality.

We don't have to experience it to advocate it; we simply have to know about it, understand it, realize how vital it is to society, and ACT upon that wisdom.

Myth#2: To be an RH advocate, one must be quite cool in dealing with all things sexual. Or its opposite: Being an RH advocate means you must immediately have a slutty personality.

Let me address the second one first: "Porket kayang sabihin ang vagina, pokpok agad? Di ba pwedeng liberated muna?"

Being liberated - being free - is generally a good thing, especially to RH advocates. To be an advocate of reproductive health means having the guts to break out of society's bonds and talk about the human body - along with its many functions - in ways that has been deemed taboo by society. You have to be able to say, "Kapag po nilabasan ang sexual partner sa loob ng ari ng babae, maari pong mabuntis, kaya importante po na alamin kung kelan ang huling regla dahil malalaman natin dito kung safe o hindi safe ang babae na makipagtalik. O kaya pwede rin naman pong gumamit ng condom na ilalagay sa ari ng lalaki para hindi mapunta ang similya sa ari ng babae." And you have to be able to say this with a straight face, or else the person you're educating would either smirk at you knowingly (if the person is a perv), or get scared of talking to you (because you look like a perv).

How else can we teach reproductive health and safe sex practices, sign language? Educators are professionals - this is what sets us apart from the internet porn teaching girls and boys about sex. 

On the other hand, RH advocates are far from frigid - not just in bed, but in their other passions. I've met people who feel strongly not just about RH and its other components. One of my idols, Ana Santos, sassy editorial director of sexandsensibilities.com, is equally supportive of bettering the lives of single parents. Nr. Alvin Dakis of the Alliance of Young Nurse Leaders and Advocates is always at the business end of online bashing because of his advocacy for LGBT rights as well as reproductive health. And, of course, isn't Senator Miriam Defensor-Santiago always fiery about her campaigns against idiocy?

Myth#3: Pro-RH Advocates are unwilling to listen to the arguments of Anti-RH advocates.

Not true. If it is then why did writer Miguel Syjuco and Leloy Claudio recently invited Anti-RH Senator Tito Sotto to a debate? We want proper discourse, wherein we can answer the questions of the Anti-RH camp sans throwing crap and "satanista" accusations around. Most of us would be happy to know your opposition to the bill, and present our side as to why we are for it. We would like to listen to you and explain our side. Although seriously, our arguments (like the opposite camp's) is quite available online. Feel free to Google them.

It does get tiring, though, that some people would hide behind the pretense of wanting to understand our points of view when in fact all they want to do is troll. And if someone is trolling, then we'll have you know that we have better things to do than rise to your bait.

Which brings me to the next RH advocate myth.

Myth#4: RH advocates are idiots and are only following a popular choice.

Providing accessible, universal reproductive health care to people is a popular notion. RH advocates are supporting a popular notion. In fact, a survey conducted by the Social Weather Station concluded that majority are in favor of the provisions of the RH Bill (http://www.sws.org.ph/pr20110811.htm), so I guess the second part of the myth is confirmed.

Our support, however, is not about popularity. Most of the RH advocates I've met are for the bill because they've read the bill. They took time to digest its contents and formulate their opinions. Which is why I have respect for those who've read the bill before they become Anti-RH, and still have the brains to not believe some of the more ludicrous stuff being thrown around. 


Any other myths you want busted?