VAGINA: Say it three times, slowly, and with relish

People will probably throw you weird looks, flinch horribly, and think you’re a maniac.

The Pinoy society is apparently sensitive to the topic of sex and sexuality, treating it as taboo. Ironically, sensuous pictures are used in ads, prostitution is rampant, and the ordinary Juan’s mouth would spill something green, and sometimes down-right malicious- during the everyday tambay mode. It’s not just the drunk men on the sidewalk toma parties, either. College students. Professionals. Mothers with little children.

My problem is this: For heaven’s sakes, we blab about sex almost all the time, use it as topics for jokes, as trinkets on ads (that sometimes do not even make sense). Kids hear it. They see it on TV. Adolescents talk about it in school. Boys as young as twelve gossip about who’s got the biggest boobs, and that weird tingling sensation they get down there when they ‘accidentally’ touch them.

Not a big thing, right? It’s part of today’s society, like internet porn, jejemons, PNoy’s love life, and Willie Revillame. If it were, protesters might be storming the Congress as we speak, demanding laws against people with dirty mouths.

Then why is shedding light to sex, in a clear, rational, scientific way a problem?

Many people point out that sex education is the responsibility of the parents. True. Parents are, as the old saying goes, the first teachers.

Just a thought: Because of the apparent “sensitivity” of Filipinos to the topic of sex, parents very rarely speak to their children. There are no “the birds and the bees” conversations, just “Don’t get pregnant", or "I’ll kick your ass out of the house” proclamations. Or worse: “Sex is bad.”

You can’t deny that it happens. Perhaps not to you, if you’re lucky, but to most Pinoys, they learn about sex through three possible was: the biology book, the secret conversation with their peers, and through experience, willing or not.

These methods of learning are not exactly ideal, and the typical Pinoy parent is either too busy to talk sex, or is too embarrassed to do so. Even if they did have the time, their knowledge would be better supplemented by medical professionals who study these things intensively. Take into consideration that sexuality is not just about morality, it is also a great factor that affects social, emotional, and physiological well-being. Who spent years prying the functions of the human body for years? Doctors. Nurses. Health workers. I’ve still got my books to prove it.

“So go to an OB.” Easy enough to do. But if you are young, this simple step proves to be a challenge. Being in the stage of adolescence and at a lost about sexuality, and being distrustful of most adults (who probably most of which probably exude an air of distrust and suspiciousness), most teenagers opt to keep their questions to themselves. This is when the apparent “shame” gets in the way of information.

So first thing’s first: Remove the tags “devil”, “life will be ruined”, “evil” and “obscene” to the discussion of sexuality. Speak sensibly about it, especially to children, to teens, so that they will be able to talk about it, their concerns, about the things that confuse them. Doing this will result to better communication between child and parents.

Second step: Allow professional support. People from the medical profession genuinely want to help. In fact, it is our responsibility to do so. No one can deny that expert advice is an advantage in any situation. Allow well-trained teachers to supplement everyone with the know-how on how to be sexually healthy, not only physically, but in all aspects as well.

Open up, let the knowledge flow. Information leads and well-formed decisions, perhaps not all the time, but most of the time. And in this day and age, information (true or false) is widely available. Would you rather have hearsays or concrete facts and data?

Open up.

Begin by saying “vagina” slowly, three times, and with relish. I assure you, it’s liberating.

And to hell with what others think.